From Kijiji

This is just top notch. Cherie found this ad online tonight. Let's read it together (my comments are in red), I have left it as found, spelling errors and punctuation (or lack thereof) and all:

Hello I am a Mother of One baby boy he is 13 months and i am on mothers alowence , I would like to have a job babysiting a couple of children from ages 1-3 because i can not take childrewn to school or get them of buses as i have to be home with my child. i would like to make a bit of exstra money to support me and my baby better but has to be paid under table and can not claim in your taxes (we certainly wouldn't want a reduction in your mothers allowance)! I do not have any cpr or that kinda stuff but i am a mother (little did I know, that being a mother gives you magical powers and therefore no need for that kinda stuff)! I have my own apartment located near the oshawa center at ********** avenu. and i am on the 4th flour (how many grains?) of the apartment building my doors for belcony will be shut all times (phew, you calmed my weary nerves about you)and dont worry i am responsible (you sound it) there will be no danger (except to a child psychological well being). I would like to babysit from 8 in the morning to 5 pm or 6 pm. i will also be baby sitting a nother baby girl whom is 11 months old (poor kid). and she is my niece! i can only take to more kids ! brother and sister or to children from diffrent familys (thank you for the explanation, that really cleared up the to children thing) the first to people that resapond to this add will be the only if interestede in me caring for your child (never, not in a million years). I do have a playpen and a high chair (sounds like a well rounded nursery) and the babys room is my room (even better) witch (is it Hallowe'en?) will be afe (no comment necessary) to play well in my care please get back if interested thank you **********!

Any takers? I can pass on the original if you would like...