Hand-Holding Guy

Hello All.

Let me tell you a little about what happened to me last night. I am sure you will all enjoy this as it was clearly one of the most embarrassing moments of my life.
It started very innocently. A drive into Toronto with friends to celebrate Kirsty's birthday. We went to The Laugh Resort in downtown Toronto for a comedy night. I have never been to a comedy club before but I knew one thing - I DID NOT WANT TO BE NEAR THE STAGE.

So we get there and where are our seats, just to the left of the stage. So everyone sits down leaving Cherie and I with the seats nearest the stage. Great. Before the show started the lights went down and I though, okay, not too bad, I am basically in the dark. Then the stage lights came on...gasp. I basically had a spotlight on me.

The emcee comes out, tells some jokes. Safe. The first comic comes on, tells some jokes...SOME ABOUT ONSTAR...still safe. 2nd comic comes out, still good. Finally it's time for the main act. So far so good.

Main act comes out...this is him:

He is on for a while before he starts talking about relationships and looks over at me. I tried to avoid making eye contact to no avail. Ugh. He started asking me questions and referring to me as Hand-Holding Guy (as I was holding Cherie's hand). It went on FOREVER. Well, maybe not forever but it certainly felt like it. After his attention went elsewhere Cherie wanted to let go on my hand as hers was sweaty. NO WAY. I am not letting go and giving him more ammo. No way. No how. Attention came back to me a little later with some other crude jokes and I could not even make eye contact with the guy - how embarrassing. Everyone else had a good laugh.

Last year for Kirsty's birthday we dared (and paid) her to get up and dance in the middle of a quiet restaurant. It cost the group $130 to get her to do it because she was embarrassed. I paid $8 last night to be the centre of attention. Where is the fairness in that.